Thursday, May 31, 2012

Working on me.

I need to make some major changes in my life.
There are personal issues I need to work on, like Jorge and I, and others like how the heck I'm going to support two kids and just working on my personality; I want to be friendlier, someone people want to spend time with. I've been reading plenty of self-help blogs lately- not to try to fix myself, but more to learn how to simplify my life. While reading these, I came across a few really inspiring posts that I wanted to share! Maybe if I'm ever having a rough day I can just look at these and get up and want to feel good again. :)

The first is a post from Becoming Minimalist. I'm not the biggest fan of the title.. I definitely don't think these things are important so you can "impress others", but I do think this is a great post anyway.
Some of my favorite parts were:

3. Be Optimistic. Always, always, always focus on the good aspects of people and situations. Sometimes you have to look harder than others, but you’ll always be glad you did.
8. Appreciate Different Opinions. While there is nothing wrong with being dogmatic in your beliefs, a healthy appreciation of how others came to theirs is definitely an impressive quality.
9. Love Your Life. Don’t fall into the trap of living life like everyone else. Avoid television and consumerism. Embrace your passions and find enjoyment in your life. The people around you will be impressed… and jealous.

3. Being optimistic is a tough one for me. If I don't see things going right.. I assume they're going wrong. I tend to put things off and say yeah it'll be fine.. so I guess that could be considered optimistic.. But I always know deep down that in the end since I'm putting it off I'm basically screwing myself so that's not really being optimistic ha.

8. Appreciating different opinions is a huuuuge one for me. Jorge and I have been fighting a lot lately, & I believe this is because we are just so different. We come from two completely different cultures and nothing about us is the same. I have a really hard time appreciating anything he does for Betsey because it's not the same way I would do it. This is wrong and I know that, but I just want things to be done the same.. I want my kids to be used to things being done one way, and I want him to put things away where they belong, and I want him to believe what I believe, and talk the way I do............ We are just so different. :(

9. Wow, I don't even know how to love my life anymore. In fact, I don't know how to do pretty much anything on that entire list! I want to print it out and tape it on every wall of my apartment so I can practice it because it amazes me how much I have forgotten how to be a nice, happy person who loves her life. It says embrace my passions. Well my passion would be my baby! Really she is the only think I can think of that I care about anymore. Finding the best way possible to raise my babies. Which to me right now is finding another job. Hopefully one that will pay a decent wage so that I don't have to work too much so that I still have time with my babies! Gosh being a mom is freakin harddddd. Once I can pay my bills and I know I am taking care of my family, while still getting to spend time with them and doing fun things, I guess that's loving life!? WOW, how the heck am I going to do that?

Okay, here's the next post. It's from zenhabits, I'll do the same and add some of my favorites from the post (There are quite a bit. There are 72 in this list compared to the 15 in the last..)

6. Learn to say no. This is actually one of the key habits for those trying to simplify their lives. If you can’t say no, you will take on too much. Article here.
8. Limit your media consumption. This tip won’t be for everyone, so if media consumption is important to you, please skip it (as with any of the other tips). However, I believe that the media in our lives — TV, radio, Internet, magazines, etc. — can come to dominate our lives. Don’t let it. Simplify your life and your information consumption by limiting it. Try a media fast.
11. Edit your rooms. One room at a time, go around the room and eliminate the unnecessary. Act as a newspaper editor, trying to leave only the minimum, and deleting everything else. Article here.
31. Learn to live frugally. Living frugally means buying less, wanting less, and leaving less of a footprint on the earth. It’s directly related to simplicity. Here are 50 tips on how to live frugally.
36. Learn what “enough” is. Our materialistic society today is about getting more and more, with no end in sight. Sure, you can get the latest gadget, and more clothes and shoes. More stuff. But when will you have enough? Most people don’t know, and thus they keep buying more. It’s a neverending cycle. Get off the cycle by figuring out how much is enough. And then stop when you get there.
38. Eat healthy. It might not be obvious how eating healthy relates to simplicity, but think about the opposite: if you eat fatty, greasy, salty, sugary, fried foods all the time, you are sure to have higher medical needs over the long term. We could be talking years from now, but imagine frequent doctor visits, hospitalization, going to the pharmacist, getting therapy, having surgery, taking insulin shots … you get the idea. Being unhealthy is complicated. Eating healthy simplifies all of that greatly, over the long term. Read about how to simplify your eating habits.
51. Live life more deliberately. Do every task slowly, with ease, paying full attention to what you’re doing. For more, see Peaceful Simplicity: How to Live a Life of Contentment.
57. Go for quality, not quantity. Try not to have a ton of stuff in your life … instead, have just a few possessions, but ones that you really love, and that will last for a long time.
58. Read Simplify Your Life, by Elaine St. James. One of my favorite all-time authors on simplicity. Read my review here.

6. I am happy to say that I am finally learning to say no in my life. I have been totally being used in my job by one woman and when I finally spoke up to her, it may have lessened my hours, if not completely destroyed them, but at least I won't be wasting my whole summer working for someone who is totally using me!
8. Limiting my media consumption is kinda a tough one but important. I am doing this already a little, mostly because I can't afford a cable bill ha. I would like to lower the amount of time I spend on my iphone everyday though. It kind of takes over my life sometimes!
11. I have done this already. But I think it could be something that I do every few months, at least every 6 months. I already want to do it again even though I've brought hardly anything new into the apartment, I just feel like I still have too much that I don't use.
31. Buying less is easy when you're broke like me ha. Wanting less is getting easier when you start reading blogs like these and realize that you don't really need any of this stuff that you go shopping for every other day. Leaving less of a footprint can be tough at first because it takes a little while to acquire these things, like reusable grocery bags, so you don't have to continue using disposables.
36. This is kind of the same as the last one, learning what enough is reminds me of myself when I got my settlement money from my car accident. All I wanted to do when I had all those thousands of dollars at first was go shopping! I had everything I needed already, but I still wanted to go shopping everyday because I had the money. Yikes.
38.  Eating healthy is just a good tip all around. Being healthier and curing yourself of all these crazy diseases naturally, which yes, I do believe you can do my eating healthily, is an amazing way to live simply and avoid problems in the future.
51. This one is a little confusing to me, I think it means having a goal and not rushing crazily everyday to reach this goal, but doing everything on purpose, calmly in order to reach your goal. Wow, now that I've written this out, it makes a lot more sense to me! It sounds like common sense doesn't it? Something that everyone would want to do. But dang, if you don't slow down and really think about this, you're not going to do it; you're not going to stop doing 10 things at once and rushing to get to your goal. Wow.
57. Another thing I'm really working on. I haven't been shopping much lately, but when I do, I am trying to avoid the dollar section so that when I get something I absolutely need, I will get something that will last. That is something I never really thought about. I'd get a few things in the dollar section at a time because it's cheap and of course it's cheap and would break so I'd have to replace it a few months later. I'm soooo sick of that! Clothes too. I need to ditch Forever 21 and their holey clothes and start checking out Gap's sale racks more often.
58. I love reading. I have been doing a ton of it online recently and also I'm reading George Orwell's 1984 whenever I have the time, but this sounds like a good book!! Maybe I'll flip through the pages at Barnes & Noble one day :)

There are so many more posts that have inspired me lately but I don't have the time right now to find them.. Maybe I'll add some links later to some good ones. :)

Found one! How to want less. Awesome, awesome awesome.
Here's another. It's more of a reference to other posts.. but still great!

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