I'm.....

Look at that adorable face! :) She's growing up too dang fast

Okay... Some big freaking news is about to come out. I was thinking about waiting to spread the joy but I'm pretty positive no one really reads this thing anyway ha, i mean it gets a few views here and there but I don't pay attention to where they're coming from since I don't get comments or followers or anything. Soooo... since I can't handle keeping this to myself anymore, I'M PREGNANT! Yep, #2 is 5 weeks along and very much a part of the family! & No, Betsey's little brother or sister was NOT planned at all! This is a major surprise. So much of a surprise in fact, that I've spent the majority of the day at Social Services getting financial help since I'm already broke from having one kid, & I know I need to get on it if I am going to be able to start getting ready for another.

YIKES. 

I am happy though. I really am! Whenever I thought about Betsey having a sibling, I knew I wanted them to be close in age so that they would get along. Plus, they'll keep each other busy playing for hours on end when they get older. :) Also, Jorge and I don't always get along that well & I wasn't sure if we would always be together, but I always wanted my kids to have the same dad. So that makes me happy!
We had a rough night last night (Jorge and I), taking in the news.. It had us all stressed and fighting. Then of course my mom, who always wants what's best for me and Betsey, just wants me to stop giving him chances to prove himself. I would really like to come together as a family and raise these two kids together, but we have already seen how bad a team we weer with Betsey this last 9 months, and I don't know if it will work out. We fought about it last night, but when I saw him today he asked me if I'd like to move in with him and get married! That's how he is, he changes in the blink of an eye. I'm not sure putting myself and our kids in that environment is a good idea, but being a family is what I've always wanted for us. So I'm just so confused.

 

I'm pretty much going to LIVE in skirts and dresses this summer! It's like 105 out here, & I'll be pregnant in the worst of it. NO FUN.

CLICK THAT PICTURE & READ THEIR STORY! They make me want to have a home birth. But considering this is going to be another high risk pregnancy, probably going to be in a hospital to be safe.

 

 

WOW. what a gorgeous belly!

Wow. I LOVED being pregnant. I really did, I am really going to enjoy this! I just wish i wasn't in this financial rut. :( 

times are freakin TOUGH. But I'm going to be getting all the government help I can, plus Jorge's parents are going to be paying him more so he can help us. THANK GOD. :) 

IF ANYONE READS THIS THAT DOES KNOW ME, PLEASE DON'T POST ANYTHING ON FACEBOOK. (MY FAMILY DOESN'T KNOW YET.) I know I'm terrible for not telling my family first.. My mom knows but I haven't had time to get to my sisters and my dad is going to really push me to give it up for adoption and they are just so negative and stressful. Every time I get off the phone with one of them I am freaked out about money or something else, and this is a good time for me to stay as calm as possible. 

Jorge's family is good about being calm all the time, I think I'll have to start hanging out with them a little bit more. Must be a Mexican thing ;)

 <3

It can only get better..

Trying to feed a puree to Betsey yesterday....

   I had THE worst day yesterday. I woke up in a terrible mood. As soon as I woke up, I immediately began thinking about how I'm going to be totally broke soon,  and  how I'm not going to be able to pay my bills.. maybe I had a dream about it? I don't know but it pretty much set my whole day off in a negative way. Then I decide today is the day to go to the court house and finally fill out the paperwork to get some child support. So I put Betsey on the couch right next to me and I'm looking through the pile of laundry for some socks for her and in a split freakin second she's crawling off the couch face first onto the carpet. FUCK. If I've ever felt like the world's shittiest parent, it was at that moment. Of course I know not to put her on the couch, DUH.. but i was standing right there! Come on! So then I'm trying to feed her breakfast really fast so we can get out and on our way to the court. Yesterday just happened to be the day that she was absolutely DONE with purees. No more. She ate some puffs while I was getting her Puree warmed up but that was normal, she wouldn't eat any more of it. Fuck me. So we spend 20 minutes searching for some "real food" that she will eat.. I ended up giving her plums and a baby fruit bar. Very nutritional. 

   So I stop by my work, before getting to the court house, I had to go talk to Mike about getting me some more work.. Then I get there and talk to a lady in the family law assistance section.. She looks at my file and goes on to tell me that the custody paperwork that I filed months ago was never finished! WTF! Someone could have told me that I had a few more steps to take! Losers. So she was very patient with my million questions, told me exactly what to do, and I did everything I could to get it done. I took Betsey to Chipotle for lunch since that's the only think I could think of that she'd eat (expensive kid) and we came back to see the paralegal. He was awesome! He got my paperwork ready and now I have to go back on Monday to have it all stamped and sent out. WHAT A NIGHTMARE. This could have been done 6 months ago. FUCK.

   Once that was over we went back home to let my dog out cause he had been caged up for a few hours, and we went to see my mom before we had to go to work. Then, to add to my hectic day, as soon we we left for work we see the text that says not to come for another hour......... HAHAHA shit. So we turn around, call my mom and tell her to make me some coffee cause not only was I exhausted, but i had a crazy headache. This didn't end being such a good idea because I haven't had a cup of coffee in a couple weeks and I'm still breastfeeding so it really threw Betsey off last night. She had a rough time falling asleep. :( OOPS. At least it woke me up? But once she fell asleep she was out for the night, that was nice cause we ended up staying there til midnight!

Today is a new day.

That saying could not be any more true!

We laid in bed giggling for half an hour, then got up and I started cooking back beans, and we had organic oatmeal and pineapple. Tea for me and water for Betsey. <3  

Total turn around from yesterday!

   Now Betsey's napping in her crib, giving her mommy a break :) Oh I almost forgot to mention our awesome news! We got approved for the Giving Diapers Giving Hope!! I am SOOOO excited about this! It's for low income families to get cloth diapers. I just filled out the application and paid the $35 shipping fee and I can't wait to get them in the mail! What a blessing seriously! This is going to save me a ton of money.

Well I should probably take advantage of Betsey sleeping and jump in the shower :)

v e g a n

I just rewatched Forks Over Knives on netflix.. still amazing! I've watched it before and liked it a lot, and it really made be start thinking about what I was eating. I'd say the amount of meat I ate after watching it did slow down, but didn't stop like it has now.
Some of the other documentaries I like on netflix are Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead and Food Matters, but I have pretty much every food related documentary on netflix in my Instant Queue ready to be watched in the near future.
I still can't believe how much my life is changing. Just from simply reading and watching some documentaries. All this information was out there, I just hadn't been listening before. I didn't care at all to eat better or use organic products. I am definitely feeling good about this though!!

I've decided that it is the smarter decision based on what I've learned to keep my family on a plant based diet. We're going to go all the way- Vegan. Since researching, I've found the benefits of ridding dairy are pretty amazing. Finding out that milk actually leaches calcium from the body, doing exactly the opposite of what the media says it does, really made an impact on me. Not only have I learned that we don't need milk to get what we need, but it just bothers me altogether that the media can blatantly lie like that. I read that it is well known in the medical field that milk is bad for you, yet they still do nothing about it. Unbelievable. I found a few websites that help guide parents of vegan families, & I'm loving them! 1 2 3 4 5 6 Here are some other sites I found pretty inspiring, 1 2 3 4 :) I also found a handy list of restaurants that serve vegan dishes, or how you can tweak them to become vegan. :)

How many meat eaters does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they would rather stay in the dark about things. 

New me.

I feel like a completely different person. 

I don't even think the same way I did a few weeks ago. I'm obsessed with my book, Skinny Bitch, I'm reading labels on all my food, I'm getting into groups on Meetup that hike to explore plants and their natural healing methods, I'm gathering ideas about growing an herb garden in an old dresser drawer on my porch, I'm reading The Vaccine Book to finally find out the straightforward facts about vaccines, and I haven't ate meat in at least a week, I may be not be eating any dairy soon either. I know I can't make all these life altering decisions based off what one good book says, so I'm going to do my research, and if milk really is bad for your bones, which it looks like it is, we shall stop drinking it and get what we need from other foods.

Some books I picked up at the library!

I'm bugging the crap out of Jorge by explaining to him how terrible all the food is over and over again. Poor puy, he just wants to eat his meat everyday and drink his huge glass of milk, then give a glass of milk filled with some mexican 'enriched' chocolate powder that has who knows what in it to my kid one day. NO way jose! I am just trying to make him aware, like I am becoming by reading these books, I'm not trying to tell him to become a vegetarian like I am. Although it would be a hell of a lot easier if we did this together. But he's getting annoyed, and it's making me kind of sad. I don't think he's going to put up with this long, but it's not going to stop. And I WILL NOT allow him to give Betsey food that I don't approve of. After finding out about all the toxins in the food, how could he expect me to not freak out when he tells me he's going to take me kid out to eat that stuff when she's not with me?! Doesn't he want what's best for her?

 

So my kitchen is also looking a little different than it used to, thanks to my new knowledge of good food vs. bad food. I've never in my life had a fridge so packed with fruits & veggies! It makes me so happy! Also, this isn't food related, but I have been using less paper towels to save money for a little while now and I recently had the genius idea to grab the burp cloths out of Betsey's room that we're not using anymore and use those as rags in the kitchen also! Too bad I'm not putting as much effort into making money as I am into learning all this organic stuff! :/ I'd be loaded, this stuff is fun but doesn't happen over night.

Someone come take that macaroni salad! Grosssss & I can't throw away that much food......

Brussel sprouts, carrots, tofu <3

Now I can't forget to mention my Celadon Road progress! I have planned my first party already, and have a few people who have RSVP'd on the facebook event, but I'm going to start contacting people here pretty soon, people that I think will be interested in coming and maybe buying things or hosting! I have tried a few of the products and I really like them. The glass cleaner smells freakin awesome! I really want to get myself some face wash, and vegetable wash, but I haven't tried those. These are the things I got in my $99 start up kit! The baby wash is awesome too, especially since it's in a stainless steel container. Pretty cool to reuse! :)

Some recent pictures of the most beautiful baby girl I have ever laid eyes on.. <3

Officially a Celadon Road consultant!

Alright! It probably wasn't even a few hours after typing up my last post that I received my call from Natalie and became a consultant!
It's pretty late right now & I'm exhausted, but I've been wanting to put this information up on here so I'll do this really quickly. Here is my Celadon Road facebook page. I made it a few days ago.. It's eventually going to have info about parties and such. It doesn't have much yet, but I did but a nice little about me on it today. :) And this is the website that the company requires us to have. It's awesome cause this is the only place where you can see the prices of the products. I think I mentioned in my last post that I couldn't find their prices anywhere.. Well when I talked to Natalie for the first time, she told me that they did that so if their prices changed, it would save all that paper so they didn't have to reprint the catalogs. So smart! But kind of a hassle if you can't get onto the computer right away.. Natalie said she just prints out some price sheets and keeps them with the catalogs to give out; what a brilliant idea!

 Okay, goodnight.

Waiting on a call from CR.

    So right now I am patiently (yeah, right) awaiting my call from someone from Celadon Road, a direct sales company that I found last night that am way excited about! If you haven't heard of them before, Celadon Road is pretty much like Avon, you throw parties, try to sell the products to all your friends, you can get prizes for hosting parties. The main reason I chose these guys over any others is because they sell all green, organic, eco-friendly pruducts. Go ahead and take a look through their catalog, you won't be disappointed! They have great looking products for health, beauty, cleaning, BABY TOYS & LOTIONS, pets, home decor, jewelry and more. I'm obviously pretty excited ha, but then again I have noticed that once I find something I want to do, I get a little obsessed and start planning everything before I even know it's going to happen. So I'm not going to continue planning for this anymore until someone calls me, which I hope is today because I really want to get this going! I need the extra money in my wallet BADLY, and I really would love to start sharing with friends who have kids about the cleaning products in their homes. Buying these products would be so much easier than making everything from pinterest ha. Too bad I just went and bought all my homemade cleaning ingredients! Maybe I can still return the borax? I'm sure most of the other stuff will get used eventually. :)

 

    Alright I'm not planning anything, but I was thinking last night about hosting parties, not just for Celadon Road, but for any direct sales company that I end up doing. I have a few friends that are also selling some products like Scentsy and Thirty One that I'm hoping I can co-host some parties with! One of my friends even does facials! Maybe she would be able to make some money doing those and it would be a great way to bring women to the party. I don't know, the only thing I'm a little worried about are the prices of the products. Celadon Road doesn't show the prices of their products in their catalog, it just shows a number, so I have no idea what to expect. I've been looking around the internet and haven't found much. I'll just have to ask today when they call. I really hope it's affordable! I can see myself going far with this, hosting parties and making people want to use organic, chemical free products. I can't freakin wait. :)